So Daddy's Little Princess goes off to college. A couple weeks into the semester, she writes for money to buy a bicycle to get around campus. He sends her the money, but by the time she gets it, she's already in shape, and no longer needs the bicycle...and has since fallen for a monkey at the local pet store, so she buys that instead. A couple weeks later, the monkey falls ill, becomes lethargic, and starts molting. Not knowing what to do, she panics and writes her dad, "The hair is falling off my monkey!"
He writes back, simply, "Sell the bike".