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  • Posts

    • Watching episode 3.  This is excellent. 
    • Anyone else spend a lot of their childhood reading gamebooks (Choose Your Own Adventure, Fighting Fantasy, Be An Interplanetary Spy, Time Machine, etc.)? I've been looking for this series for years and I finally found it: https://archive.org/details/Star_Challenge_1_Planets_in_Peril/page/n1  
    • Oh well...that's just a bummer. I'd prefer something with lesser hassle in terms of maintenance. Or buy and throw like a Swatch :p 
    • So, there's a farm. And on this farm there's a cow, a chicken, and horse. The three of them are best friends.
      They do just about everything together. And one day, they're sitting at the window of the house, and the farmer's kid is watching MTV, and they're watching it, and they hear the music, and the horse says "you know what? I'm gonna learn how to do that." So the horse calls up Guitar Center, and he says to the guy on the phone, "Hey, listen. I wanna learn to play guitar." Guy on the phone says "no problem. Come on down." "No, there might be one problem. I'm a horse." "Naw, it ain't a problem. We'll get some attachments, I can teach you to play. Promise." So horse turns out to be a natural. He gets GOOD. And he calls over Cow and Chicken and he's like "LOOK WHAT I CAN DO" and he jams out like Jimi Hendrix. And Cow says "Oh man! That's awesome. I want to learn to do something like that too. What's like that?" And horse says "Bass. Learn to play bass." So Cow calls up Guitar Center, and she says "Hey, listen, I wanna learn to play bass guitar." Guy on the phone says "No problem, miss, come on down." "Eh, this might be a problem. I'm a cow." "Nah, no problem. I helped a horse recently, I can teach you to play too. Promise." So Cow learns to play the bass, and Cow is amazing at it. So Cow and Horse are jamming, and Chicken gets a bit jealous. He says "Dang, I wanna learn something too. But not like that." Horse says "Well, I mean, we need a drummer around here." So Chicken calls up Guitar Center, and he says "Hey, listen, I wanna learn to play drums." Guy on the phone says "No problem, man. Come on down." "Eh, maybe a problem. I'm a chicken." "Naw. Ain't no thing. I taught a horse guitar and a cow bass. I can teach you drums." So chicken learns the drums, and he's amazing. So Cow, Horse, and Chicken all start having jam sessions whenever the farmer's out. And one day they're playing, and a big record agent is driving down the road. And he hears them, and he's like "what is that? that sounds amazing." so he stops at the farm, and he finds them all playing in the barn. And he says "You guys sound AWESOME. I wanna represent you, make this a real band, make some music. You're gonna be HUGE." So Cow and Chicken and Horse take this guy's deal, and they move to the city, they cut albums, and they're big. REAL big. Top 10 hits, platinum albums, the works. They get set for their first tour. But there's a problem, see. Horse gets a phone call, his mom's real sick. Cow and Chicken, though, they're cool. They say "Listen. Go see your mom. We'll delay the first show a couple of days, so fly back home, spend some time with her, and then jump on a plane and come meet us." Horse says "Thanks, guys. you're the best," and he takes off. Couple of days later, Horse's mom is just fine. Turned out to be a real bad cold, she gets over it, and he spends another night there. The following morning, he gets a call. It's his agent. Cow and Chicken's plane went down, they died in the crash. The band is done. he's lost his best friends. And horse, this breaks him, man. He's been through so much with them, and he feels real down in the dumps. So he takes a walk, and while he's on that walk, he just can't shake the blues, so he figures to himself "Alright, alright. One drink, just to get over it." So Horse walks into the local bar. Bartender looks at him and says "Hey. Why the long face?"
    • The 6th & Final Affair  Jake was dying. His wife sat at the bedside.  He looked up and said weakly: 
      'I have something I must confess.'  'There's no need to, 'his wife replied.  'No,' he insisted, 
      'I want to die in peace.. 
      I slept with your sister, your best friend, 
      her best friend, and your mother!'  'I know,' she replied. 
      'Now just rest and let the poison work.'
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